British Bengali

British Bangladeshi Problems…

By- Najia & Nazifa

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In the UK, you’re not from here and in Bangladesh; you are a “Londoni”. Excuse me, are we refugees please? We are British Bangladeshi’s; we have a nationality, and an ethnicity! (Bangladeshi’s we request you to please make us feel at home, we are one of you! Only difference is we live here but that doesn’t make us outsiders)

People never pronounce your name correctly at school, let alone trying to spell it out! Our names are not hard you know, it’s hard enough at home when Farzana turns into Faajana and Omar into Omooor…

More people live in your flat than there is in the whole building. Because our fathers earn millions right; we can accommodate for the whole of China’s population.

Flooring and “fataire” is always the solution to sleepovers. As a guest you don’t need to worry about where you will sleep, I will always be the one having to give up the comforts of my lovely bed for you to sleep, whilst my bed is made on the hard cold floor with a tiny space… or if you are nice enough we’ll all go “fataire” which is fine if your short! But for tall people; good luck with defrosting your toes the next morning!

Your washing machine has a dryer but that is not the option, it’s all about drying clothes on radiators. Paying all those electricity bills, might as well make use of it properly!

What’s a mop? When we have a “thena”. Why spend £4.50 on a mop when we can get 4 thena’s in a pack for £1? #MoneySavingSchemes


The struggle of water bottles as “bodnas” when out in a public place – mainstream bodnas are seen as “mass destructive weapons” for “shada manush” therefore 2 water bottles are needed: one for drinking and one for… you know.

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America would be after you if they saw how much oil your mum applied to your hair the night before! Dabur amla, Vatika, Olive oil, Johnsons Baby oil, Sunflower oil .. you name it? We have it!

The cure to every health problem is Paracetamol and Vicks. Do NOT underestimate the powers of these drugs at any cost!


Next Sales are the most awaited dates in a British Bangladeshis calendar – “sale” is the favourite word in our dictionaries!


Bhaat is on the menu 3 times a day – obviously it isn’t possible to make so much space in your stomach at once for 1274679363 number of curries Ammu cooks, we have to space them out throughout the day!

Last but not least, life rocks to be part of such a beautiful culture! Being Bangali is the best feeling! 😀

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